​Does the outcome of a live sporting event really matter? Not really.
 
Over the past several years, I’ve developed the habit of recording any sporting event I plan to watch on television – golf, college basketball, college football, Major League Baseball, the NFL. For the most part, this is done to fast forward through commercials and dead time in games (see: video review situations).
 
Those time wasters/killers (along with commercials) add tremendous length to any televised contest. When first recording pro football years ago, for example, I only programmed to the actual length of the game. It soon became apparent (due to the reasons noted above) that not enough time was being allocated to see the whole game. I had to go to the extended time. Rather than ending the recording with the expected finish to the game, I had to click additional buttons to extend it 15 minutes, then 30 and now one hour extra is the standard to be safe you get the full game. Whoooo boy.
 
Appreciating the joys of fast forwarding through commercials, timeouts and video review, these recordings became mandatory. Slowly, insidiously, it became quite difficult to watch a sporting event on the tube in real time. Advertisements got in the way. Dead time in the game bored me.
 
Another factor was at work though in terms of why recording became more important. I started to find it just doesn’t really matter who wins or loses. Yeah, we all root for certain teams. We care. We want them to win. And, I am rabid at times.
 
It’s that rabid feeling that makes recording sensible. Let’s start with a short story.
 
My dad, Herm, played football for Bucknell University after WWII. He was their starting center for three years. He rooted for the Bison until the day he died, giving money, reading their newsletter regularly, knowing who the star players were.

Near the end of his life in his mid-80’s, we went to see a Bucknell game in-person, including spending time in the locker room to hear the coach do his thing. Herm was like a kid, his eyes sparkling, unable to stand still, all hyped up. Once the game started, it got worse. I did not know these things about him. He couldn’t stop his leg from jiggling.
 
His leg bounced up and down like a pogo stick the entire game. You could see him hyper-ventilating. He shifted continuously in his seat. I couldn’t figure it out. I asked if he was okay, and he looked at me with saucer pupils and nodded, “I’m just nervous about the game,” he said.
 
I thought to myself, “This is my 85-year-old father and he can’t sit still for a football team because he is so pumped up.”
 
We have blood of our parents inside us, and when I root for a team I care about these days, I better understand my dad’s jumpiness. I get wired. If the game is on late and it is close, I can’t sleep afterwards. I’m too drained.
 
What do I do? I turn the game off, knowing I have it recorded and will watch the final in the morning. And, egads, as I have done this more and more, I’ve found I’m not wired about the win or loss. I still care, but winning or losing doesn’t cause me to lose sleep. Instead, I sleep, then find out the score the next morning and watch the delayed game. All is good. The sun rose.
 
Does the outcome matter? Yes, emotionally. No, in the grand score of life. The game may be your passion. Recording it gives you perspective and some distance. You wake up refreshed from a good night’s sleep, then when you access the score online you scream in joy or pain.

​We all have many opportunities to meet new people. That can occur through day-to-day experiences, randomly, through business, meetings, introductions by others, at our place of worship, and a multitude of other ways. The point being: we can put ourself into new situations or stick to our current relationships.
 
I’m going to throw a statistic out there. For those regular readers of this column, you know I referee basketball. As a basketball official, I’m thrown in with new partners over and over and over. To me, that’s a good thing. It’s a learning experience to work with someone new, and they almost always teach you something (which could be good or bad). And, you may make a new friend (wasn’t it Roy Rogers who said something to the effect of, “A stranger is just a friend I haven’t met yet.”).
 
Here’s the stat. Over the past three years, I’ve tracked my basketball officiating partners. During that time, I have reffed with 147 new individuals. Breathe that in.
 
Now, step back. Think about your work situation or your neighbors. Have you met someone new in either of these venues in the past few years (or weeks or months)? No value judgment about this. Just an interesting exercise to consider who has entered your life during this time period in any significant way (doesn’t mean you must have an ongoing relationship; just someone who you’ve hung out with or done something with, worked on a project together, things like that).
 
If you have new people you’ve met and engaged with, have you picked up something new from any of them? Have your grown through those meetings?
 
Back to my basketball partners. The fascinating thing to me, first of all, is the large number of new officials I’ve been introduced to the past three years. That’s about 50 individuals a year. I must work with them closely. I must trust them. I must get to know them (at least in a perfunctory way because we’re going to be making high intensity decisions in a very emotional environment over the next 75 minutes or so in a high school varsity game).
Beyond trust and getting to know each individual, secondly, I pick up something from every new official. They may explain something verbally during our pregame that prepares me for the upcoming contest. They may step forward on a play during the game that we discuss afterwards and it helps me understand a rule better. They may handle an explosive coach with a special phrase, and I add that to my repertoire afterwards.
 
Third, and this gets into aging a bit, as I get older, there seem to be fewer situations where you are introduced to new people. The basketball court gives me those opportunities.
 
I also learn things not to do, like not adopting a bullying or know-it-all tone of voice with my partners or coaches. I recognize situations where I need to hold back or step forward based on what I see and hear from my partners.
 
Finally, you develop new friends through meeting others and the relationships that ensue. You may find someone you hang out with for years and years.

It’s important to keep meeting people throughout life. They help us grow and develop. Sports officiating is a great venue to experience this.

​Hard to believe it’s 2026. As like 2024, in 2025 I kept a Jar of Positivity, writing down good things that have happened in my life. It helps identify what’s important in the day to day, and with focus on enjoying those things important to you. The list follows. As like last year’s column, it is interesting to note that almost all these involve relationships, experiences and being with friends.  In no particular order:
1.Visiting two friends in Peshtigo, WI, playing trivia night and going to the Wisconsin Girls High School Basketball semi-finals in Green Bay.
2.Long-term friend came up to visit from Chicago after joining our senior baseball team. Hanging out with him for the night and going to indoor practice to introduce him to his new teammates.
3.Our two nephews’ weddings. Went to NASA, got some great barbecue, wild man dancing, saw a childhood friend for drinks, drank some great coffee, caught up with some cousins and friends from Dallas. Explored downtown Chicago, hung out behind the band watching the drummer and lead singer. Super.
4.Golf with my younger brother on a nearly empty course near Harvard, IL, temps around 55 degrees, cloudy. We scrambled to one-over par with two mulligans. I hit the crap out of the ball.
5.Trip to Maine and seeing my wife’s side of the family, along with two of our kids. Two rounds of golf at a scenic seaside course, shooting 7-under in a 4-person scramble, ferrying to an island for an e-bike tour; great dinners, sights, companionship and smells of the ocean.
6.Annual Wisconsin Security Association golf outing.
7.Annual reunion of our Kankakee, IL Traitor softball team at Oak Springs Golf Course.
8.Shooting 80 on the golf course with two buddies. A thunderstorm forced us off the course while I was playing great. Two of us waited it out, went back to play the last five holes and I missed a 17-footer for a 79 on the last hole.
9.Went from a 46 on the front nine to a 39 on the back nine at the Mayville Golf Course and had back-to-back birdies.
10.Ran the 800, 400 and 200 for the sixth year in the Wisconsin Masters Games, bettering my time in each event from the previous year. Training helps.
11.Boat trip down the Chicago River for our younger daughter’s birthday.
12.U.S. Women’s Open with my two daughters, and seeing the Comedian Nikki Glaser along with a good dinner out for a father-daughters weekend.
13.Summerfest with my younger brother and his wife. One of Milwaukee’s fun events on the lakefront. Riding the gondola, food, beer, bands.
14.Serving as a clinician in Pennsylvania for basketball officials seeking to move up to the collegiate level.
15.Annual golf, eating, drinking, storytelling, campfire reunion with my two brothers and our three sons.
16.Reunion in Chicago with college friends from our freshman-sophomore year, along with some golf. Cruised out to Lake Michigan.
17.Continuing quest to break 80 on the golf course, shot 82 at Mayville again, with three tap-in birdies. No wind, no clouds, 50 degrees out. Played in two hours.
18.Going to the NCAA golf tournament with two friends in Urbana, IL.
19.Multiple coffee chats with a good friend. It’s like therapy.
20.Morning catch-ups with three guys at the fitness facility where I work out. More therapy. Great conversations.
21.A friend of mine from Chicago who I interviewed years ago for a story who has since written a book, and said my writing inspired him. Wow. Never expected that one.
22.Officiating South Milwaukee High School on the road, and they get blown out in the basketball game, and the coach chases myself and my two partners out of the gym to shake our hands and tell us what a great job we did.
23.Younger bro and wife driving up from Illinois for my birthday.
24.Officiating the annual Badger basketball games, where 5th-8th grade teams from all over the state bring teams down to the Milwaukee metro area to compete for the state championship.
25.Hanging out with a long-term officiating buddy at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee basketball game.
26.Reunion with three college buddies from the University of Illinois, doing some bowling, having them watch me referee, and the four of us continuing our jinx of making sure Illinois loses the football game against Wisconsin that Saturday.
 
If you don’t keep a Jar of Positivity, I suggest you start in 2026. Write things down. Put them in a jar. Reread them at the end of the year. Your life will be enhanced.

​Have you heard of the Exploding Head Syndrome (EHS)? It is rampant in modern society.
 
Older people are particularly susceptible. You may have had EHS and not even known it, because the symptoms are confusing and insidious.
 
Me? I’ve been infected many times. It hurts. Feels like you’re going nuts.
 
And, of course, because your head pulsates and throbs, it feels like it’s going to explode. EHS is similar to PABVIYF disease (popping a blood vessel in your forehead).
 
How do you get it? The answer to that is easy. Is there a cure? The answer to that is no because EHS is complicated by many variables.
 
The symptoms start slowly, typically on a day that seems normal. You’ve gone online to take care of business. While you haven’t explored a new app that you must now use to get paid for services you’ve performed, you’ve been assured it’s simple, quick, easy to download and apply. Yup, sure thing. Is your forehead sizzling an egg yet? Mine was.
 
First step was to access the system. This, for some odd reason, didn’t happen. I’d used this site many times before, but “access denied” came up the first two times I clicked it on. Through my massive powers of deductive reasoning, I figured out you had to go to the bottom of the page to click on “About” and then go to the top of the page to hit “My Account.” Okay, only a slight pounding in the forehead so far. Irritation.
 
To step back for one second, you have to know that I thought I’d already set up the payment system, which is designed to electronically transfer a check to this site, where you then transfer their payment to your bank. I’d successfully – so I thought – set this up a couple of months back. Getting on to transfer the funds, I found out I hadn’t so successfully inputted my bank information so I could complete the electronic transfer. My brain started to feel fuzzy.
 
From there, the onslaught of EHS symptoms grew exponentially. Where do I input my bank information? No matter what or where I clicked, nothing came up that allowed that data upload. Try this, try that. No way.
 
I click on the video, which demonstrates how to put in the bank info. The person talks so fast that I can’t process the information and go back and forth from the video to the site to make the changes. You can’t pause the video, so I start to become a crazy man.
 
I look for other directions, tapping the keyboard, sending it to confusing drop-down menus into the dark mineshaft. Nothing there.
 
Twice I send emails asking for help, once to the direct address they list, and a second time in response to the video when it asks “was this helpful” and I wrote, “hell f….cking no.” Of course there is no quick response to either of these emails.
 
I attempt to calm down. That’s no help. I yell up to my wife, “I’m very angry. I’m raising my voice and it has nothing to do with you, please understand. I’m raging.” My blood pressure continues ascending.
 
Breathe deeply. Focus. Think about where you haven’t gone yet on the site. There must be a way.
 
After almost an hour (that may not sound like much, but with EHS it feels like 3-4 hours), TADA!, there it is. I could not replicate how I got there, but I got there. Put in the banking information. Downloaded in seconds. Yahoo. Transferred the funds to my banking account. So dang easy.
 
It really was. You just needed to know how to get there. It is simple to use. It’s just not a simple process to get there. That’s the indication you could face EHS. Then you flush the return email from the website three days later asking if you still need help resolving your problem. Thanks for that excellent customer service.