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Bonding

3/29/2020

1 Comment

 
Picture
​I played a lot with our kids as they grew up. Maybe I’m just a big kid at heart, but it was fun to be around them, throwing a ball, tossing them in pool during the summer, going sledding during the winter or playing hide-and-seek.
 
There’s so much to be said for a child’s laughter, their smile, that pure unbridled joy as they get lost in the moment. That’s probably why it was always so much fun for me, and even today I fondly watch parents playing with their kids, hearing the shrieks and missing those times.
 
So, it’s with a bit of nostalgia as the coronavirus makes us housebound hearing three of our neighbor dads out in their respective yards laughing and conversing with their kids. Home from work for whatever reason (self-isolating, or their positions being deemed non-essential), over the past week as I’ve driven down our driveway, it’s been entertaining to see and hear them playing with their children.
 
It’s a silver lining coming from our current situation – reconnecting with kids. Parents with non-adult children have the extra opportunity now to spend time teaching, playing and learning from their offspring. It’s totally understandable that without school, having the kids underfoot all day can also cause a lot of stress (and respect for the teachers who have them most of the day during the school year). I get that. Keeping kids engaged, despite their innate abilities to find things to do for themselves, can put a strain on you as a parent.
 
That being said, the positives far outweigh the negatives. It’s reflected as I hear the fathers’ voices through the woods that surround our house, the energy as they build a wood fort collectively or pull their children in the driveway in a wagon. Or just plain watch them skateboard down a slight incline, probably concerned of a potential crash, but exultant in seeing their kids taking it on, unleashing themselves with the pure joy of doing something new and on the edge.

I think that’s one of the biggest things which is so amazing about being a parent and learning from our kids as we grow up (I’ve always found it odd that we talk so much about teaching our kids, and for me, I think our kids have taught me more than I taught them, and I’m forever grateful for that): You watch them push boundaries and never think twice about it.
 
Sadly, we can easily lose that quality as we age. Maybe that’s why I’m still a big kid at heart – wanting to continue feeling those first-time joys of experience as we try something new. It could be the first time you get up on your bicycle without the help of your dad or the first time you caught a ball in a baseball mitt.
 
Listening to the three fathers who surround our house, I hear in their voices that joy of experience, listening to their kids, explaining something, adding information. And most likely, their world is being enhanced in that same way, a memory for them of bonding and play.
 
In this chaotic and cautious time, parental bonding and play is so, so critical and valuable to the family, both in terms of connecting to your children and in assuring them you are there for them. I hope those of you who are in this stage of life enjoy these moments.

1 Comment
Roscoe
4/6/2020 07:05:41 am

Great read! Hope you and Debbie and family are safe!

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