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Jar of Positivity 2024

1/12/2025

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​In 2023, for the first time I kept a “jar of positivity.” I’d read about it and thought, “good idea.” You write down over the course of the year the good things that have happened to you and place them in a jar, then collect them at the end of the year and read them to remember and revere. It was a good exercise, and I did it again this year.
A quick summation: those events, gatherings, incidents, actions, whatever, that give the most joy (at least to me) involve hanging out with others in fun situations. This is not surprising given all the data out there regarding people who feel good: their relationships are critical. So, here you go (in no particular order):
  1. Heading to the Wisconsin state high school football playoffs with my friend Peter and spending time with his sister after sitting through two frigid games.
  2. Thanksgiving in Seattle with our son, visiting Discovery Park, Pike Place Market, the Space Needle, the Pinball Museum. Hanging out, good dinners.
  3. Christmas with everyone home.
  4. New Year’s eve with my younger brother and his wife, with our alma mater Illinois put a winning touch to one of it’s best football seasons in decades.
  5. Our younger daughter’s wedding: father-daughter dance; the ceremony; the reception; seeing friends; dancing like a maniac; golfing with the father of our son-in-law (great course). And, earlier in the year, heading down for practice dancing, golfing with our daughter and son-in-law at Forest Park, getting custard, hanging outside around the firepit with a beer. Before the wedding: our son and nephew photobombing in piggyback fashion a photo taken inside the house. Uncontrollable laughter.
  6. River cruise in Milwaukee, out into Lake Michigan with my wife and our Italian exchange student. Sitting in front of the boat and watching the world go by.
  7. Golf with softball teammates from the Traitors in Kankakee, IL.
  8. Our 50th high school reunion, and finding a fake plastic arm to give people the “CLAW” hold on their heads. Too many laughs. Not enough time.
  9. Golfing with a referee buddy for the first time and eagling one of the toughest holes on the course after he hit a majestic 7-iron and I holed a 43-foot putt. Teamwork.
  10. Our annual brothers and cousins golf reunion: swimming across the lake with my nephew and not drowning; shooting down the slide into the lake and almost making it crash; hot wings contest; defeating our sons in the annual three-day scramble for the first time in year (playing lights out); good food; great stories; campfire; relaxing.
  11. Annual golf tournament with the Wisconsin Security Association and good times with current and former colleagues
  12. A new and favorite restaurant serving Nepalese food.
  13. A first round win in the playoffs in our 55+ men’s baseball league.
  14. Maren Morris concert (first concert in more than 10 years).
  15. Comedy Sportz World series featuring Seattle vs. Chicago.
  16. Golf before the bridal shower with son-in-law, his brother and father.
  17. Running the 800, 400 and 200 in the Wisconsin Masters Games. Okay, jogging. Perhaps shuffling.
  18. Annual freebie game with guys from our church at the Milwaukee Brewers, eating subs, catching up with home brews in the parking lot.
  19. Trip to Maine: massage from a woman my wife and I have been going to for more than 30 years; spectacular weather; quality time with our older daughter; shooting three straight great rounds at a wonderfully scenic and challenging course. Maybe I was relaxed.
  20. Referee camp in Pennsylvania where I serve as a clinician. Helping other officials improve. The drive out and back with my wife.
  21. The Hall-of-Fame banquet for our Wisconsin Masters Games. Great to see the accomplishments of older athletes who continue to compete.
  22. Watching Caitlin Clark and Iowa in the semifinals and finals of the NCAA women’s DI college basketball championship.
  23. Visiting with good friends from Texas, who have built their dream home east of Dallas on a lake: golf, fishing, storytelling, funny late night text messages.
  24. Surprising my older brother for his 70th birthday and a round of golf with him his two closest buddies. Conversation, beer.
  25. Refereeing the eighth grade basketball B championship contest in the Wisconsin State Games with my good friend John. No exaggeration: we got seven compliments over the course of the last two games of parents and coaches coming up to us afterwards to tell us what an excellent job we did on the court. Earlier we had received four compliments after working a fifth grade game. Remember that.
  26. Driving to Minneapolis to the Big Ten men’s basketball tournament with my wife to watch two games. Staying at a boutique hotel in Eau Claire on the drive back and walking over for a good meal and cocktails.
  27. Refereeing a high quality high school basketball game with two new partners in a tightly contested battle. Walking out, a huge man beelined to us across the hallway. He comes up, and goes, “That’s the best officiating job we’ve had here this season.” Made our day, perhaps our season.
  28. Seeing the “Blizzard Acrobats” with my younger brother and wife. Long walk the next morning on a cold day.
  29. Working a Saturday morning high school 9th grade boys basketball game with a guy I’d never met before and feeling like we were on the exact same page the entire game. Zen.
  30. Heading down to Washington University in St. Louis and taking in a baseball and basketball game over the course of the weekend, sitting outside on a beautiful spring day and enjoying the sun. Scrambling with my son on the Forest Park golf course to hit three consecutive birdies to break 80. Crushing the ball and dialed in (writing this just now triggered the memory).
  31. Text from a friend who said I should be refereeing high school state championship level games. Nice to have friends like that with belief in you.
  32. Ongoing LinkedIn conversations with a good friend who my wife and I met on the running/dog walking trail and had him join our Ragnar team in 2023. Stayed in touch ever since.
Connections. Quality time. Conversation. Laughter. Golf. Hang out time. Sitting around fires telling stories. It all fits.

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