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Where Anonymous Messages Go To Die

4/19/2015

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In the business and personal worlds we inhabit in April 2015, it’s easy to presume that the electronic connection with people will prove fruitful.  Because we spend so much time using devices to get in touch with others (or not), it seems that’s the best way to go.  But it’s a misconception.

The electronic connection is faulty.  It’s the human connection that works.

Recently, I started a conversation with another business person.  We wrote over LinkedIn.  The transmissions flew back and forth.  Typically a day or two passed before a response.  We attempted to set up a time, date and location for coffee.

“What’s a good day for you?,” I wrote.

“Next Thursday and Friday are out, but otherwise I’m good,” he wrote back.

“Ooops, sorry, I missed something on my calendar.  Both those days are actually closed. How about the following week?,” I said two days later in the transmission.

“Darn, I’m traveling that whole week to Vegas.  What about the week after?,” he responded.

That dialogue (and some other bits and pieces) took place over close to two weeks, and eventually resulted in us setting up a face-to-face meeting, but who knows if we’ll even keep that?  Something could come up and then we’ll have another series of electronic communications that could (or could not) result in a resolution.     Not getting a productive answer has happened before.  It will happen again.

Starting that conversation when you are face-to-face is so much better.  You can ask all the questions you want, get direct answers, do a follow-up, and blam, you settle everything.  “See you then.”  You can now grab a beer.

You may not know the other individual when you attempt to start a business (or personal) relationship electronically.  You’re just writing words down.  You don’t get the full flavor of the individual.

You miss the gestures, eye contact, head nods, smiles and frowns.  You don’t get the nuance of full body language responses to what you say.

Meeting face-to-face, you analyze the personality of your new acquaintance.  When the person shows up on time (or not) helps you determine his or her responsibility.  Does s/he demonstrate s/he cares about and respects your time?  All it takes is that one meeting when you get together and you make that determination.  Electronic communication allows both parties to survive their recalcitrance.

Getting together also helps you find out how the other person accepts or gives feedback.  That’s an important quality to assess in a business or personal relationship.  That doesn’t come across on email or texting.

Over the past four months, I’ve developed business in multiple face-to-face settings.  Working electronically, I’ve sent out proposals, materials and responded to inquiries, with next to nothing when it comes to response.  I’ve gone to Web sites, emailed people, texted them, used various e-business functions to try and get in touch, but for the most part those transmissions have fallen into deep space where anonymous messages go to die.

Part of the problem is the sheer magnitude of electronic options when it comes to places where you can seek freelance business.  How do you start?  Which sites are meaningful and which ones are four-day-old garbage?  There’s no way to know.  So, it’s “ready, fire, aim.”  Unless you know someone (hmmm, back to that face-to-face thing again) who can give you advice on which sites are nominally functional, you’re going after business with no bullets in the chamber.

Seeking business or building a lasting business relationship is best started on a face-to-face basis.  Do it.  The electronic connection is faulty.

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