​Riding with a coworker to a job site recently, we got off on a tangent about traits needed to survive in the world today. Part of the discussion related to where we worked, where a thick skin is quite relevant to getting by. But, in general, he suggested there are a number of skills that many people miss – whether that be in school or how they were raised or just plain picking up abilities as they go through life.
 
Once our parents are done with us and we leave school behind (at whatever level), we’re not done learning. That’s probably one of the biggest fallacies of life. Whether you want to or not, you continue experiencing new things, which means we all have the opportunity to grow.
 
Ongoing life lessons can be humorous, serious, logical or take intuitive leaps. We might absorb new information or pick up a trait fairly quickly or over a number of years. Whatever the lesson may be, somehow it ensures better survival of the species. Here are a few that probably make sense if we’re all not going to go crazy:
 
Sarcasm 101: In some ways, you could describe this course load as: “Don’t lose your sense of humor.” But it is way more. This class implies developing a razor wit, being able to diagnose and slice the issues of the day quickly and with sharp wording that makes others laugh and deflects some of the stupidity we face on a daily basis. To become truly expert, Sarcasm 101 requires not only study, but practice. Hands-on sessions with comedians and smart-asses would be required. Major Benefit: Graduates gain a thicker skin.
 
Changing Your Tires 201: The ability to change a tire is no longer a given in today’s world, as many people with just call on their smart phone for help if they get a flat. No matter the car, the basics remain. Get out the jack, find the correct spot to insert it, and crank it until the tire is off the pavement. Twist the bolts off with the wrench. Take the tire off, put the new one on. Tighten bolts. Lower car to ground. Okay, end of class. Now go find the owner’s book in your car so you can find out where all those tools have been hidden. Major Benefit: Not having to pay for a tow job.
 
Reading Directions 301: This class may sound self-evident. But, just about everybody at some point is guilty of winging it and failing, then going back to look at that little booklet and saying, “Hmmm, should have read this first.” If you know how to cook, install a router, or fix a lawnmower, by all means, go for it. If not, take this class. You will be reminded over and over: READ THE INSTRUCTIONS! If you don’t get the message, it will be repeated at the start and finish of every class. Major Benefit: Improved reading skills, greater confidence in finishing tasks, and a new-found confidence that you can get things done that were previously presumed complicated (sometimes anyway).
 
How to Effectively Return Phone Calls (Advanced Class) 401: Since almost nobody in the world seems to know how to return phone calls any more, this difficult and intense course of study would teach the student how to pick up the smart phone and dial the number that came in, with explicit instructions on the exact ten digits to punch in. As a bonus, the class would remind you to do this in timely manner. Major Benefit: Resolving problems quickly rather than texting or emailing 27 times with no resolution.
 
There you have it. Time to study. Success is just down the road.

​What could be easier than changing a hose? Not switching two hoses, that’s for sure.

A good friend of mine, envisioning a side career as an amateur handyman, decided to do that recently. The disastrous results only pointed once again to how the simplest of tasks in today’s world can become torturous and run into more money than any of us expected.

His incident only related in him getting soaked, hoses popping off and spurting water over his work clothes, but if it had been you or someone else trying a slightly more complex task, who the heck knows how bad things could have gotten.

His situation began innocuously enough. He is having some work done on his house. The workers rehooked up the washer and reversed the hot/cold hoses. The first batch ruined some of his wife’s clothes when they were done in scalding water.
 
He figured out the problem and tried to reverse the hoses in the morning. The cold went on fine. The hot coupling was dodgy, but he got it in place. He turned the water back on. The hot hose popped off and saturated him – as he was getting ready to head off to his real job. Curse words ensued, I’m sure, then he screwed it back on and firmly tightened it with channel locks, then turned the water on. The hose stayed in place, but leaked at the coupling point badly.
 
Now he has to grind on the contractor to come fix the mess. As he puts it, “WHAT COULD BE EASIER THAN SWITCHING OUT TWO HOSES?!??!?”
 
One would certainly figure it to be an easy job. But like many other tasks today, it’s not. Sometimes you have to bite the bullet and hire the professional.
 
Today, I watched a guy describe to a saleswoman at an appliance store a leak on top of his stove that went into the dials, causing them to short and release smoke. He wanted to fix the problem and was talking to the woman behind the counter about what piece he needed and how to put it in.  I thought, “Nope, don’t do it.” Listening to him, I started to comment, asking questions about whether he was good with appliances and had he ever done that type of replacement before. He was already hesitant about his talent level, and my questioning made him even more so. I don’t know how it turned out, since I left before he decided whether to purchase the quick fix or not. Hopefully, the task didn’t involve hoses and water, too.
 
The friend with the hose problem got his golf clubs regripped for a measly $90 dollars. Eleven clubs, including labor, for that price. A good deal.

Another friend mocked him, saying he could do it for $25. Now the smart person is the one who recognizes his value and his limitations. For 65 bucks, is it worth it to have someone else who knows what he is doing regrip your golf clubs? I think so. You won’t find one flying out of your hands and clobbering your playing partner in the jaw from the mediocre job that would occur if you let your friend do it.

Our lives are littered with these examples. You may be an expert on a few types of projects. If not, you have to pay.
 
More things were free AND easier 50 years ago. Less complication allowed more people to tinker, be a handyman and finish household, car or appliance projects themselves. That is WAY LESS THE CASE today.
 
Most projects are harder, more complicated and expensive with the advent of more complex technologies. We feel impotent and poorer because we don’t know what we’re doing.
 
Fix what you can. Hire the professional when you can’t. Minimize the products you own that have too many directions or wires. That’s my best advice.

​One of the greatest joys I get from cooking is sending awesome aromas throughout the house. You go out to empty the garbage, come back in, and, “MMMMMMMMM, that smells super.” Or you let a dish simmer for a bit while you go out to weed whack, and when you return you get blasted with a mixture of oregano, garlic and onions.
 
Needless to say, I love cooking. It’s creative. It decompresses you at the end of a stressful day. And you’re turning bits and pieces into a finished product.
 
The late great Charles Schulz, known for authoring the spectacular comic strip “Peanuts,” with wisdom from Charlie Brown, Lucy and Linus, was once interviewed by a major news magazine on the issue of creativity. There were a couple of specific questions that I don’t exactly remember because it was probably over 20 years ago that the story appeared. But the gist of it was that Schulz said people are happiest when they are “creating.”
 
For him, that was penning his comic strip. For someone else it could be playing music (BTW, he was also asked what instrument he would want to be able to play if stranded in the desert, and he said the harmonica because anyone who breathes can learn it, and I thought that was the greatest reply). A metal worker pounding or etching out a figure or image would feel the same way. And, Schulz specifically said something about baking/cooking.
 
Paraphrasing, he said something to the affect of, “Someone who is baking or cooking is happy because that person is creating from scratch.”
 
Another bonus of cooking is eating what you created. If more people cooked when they got home from work rather than turning on the news on the TV, I think everyone would be happier and less stressed out. First, we’d be watching less blather on the tube.

But more importantly, we’d be creating every day. You have to eat every day, so cooking dinner is something to accomplish each evening, and look forward to.

Food brings us together. Sharing a meal leads to conversation. You must look at others, pause, listen, chew, swallow, ask a question, pay attention. You are a captive audience.
 
Putting dinner together also helps you see how dishes take shape. You have to plan the temperature of the oven, know when to fry up the chicken, boil the noodles or sauté the mixed vegetables. You have to bring each part of the meal together at a specific time so it’s all warm, ready and tasty at approximately the same time. That’s a challenge. You must focus. Pulling it off brings an emotional reward of a job well done.
 
Along with the timing, you may of course further decompress with a cocktail. This may help you get additionally creative with your ingredients or just help you forget about anything you want to let go from your day. Regardless of your rationale, it’s a good thing.
 
Finally, we get the joy of watching people eat what we cooked. Sure, there are times where you botched it and you see people grimace when they take a bite of the main dish.  Oh well, sh_t happens, right?
 
But, mostly, if you practice and get good at it, whoever you are cooking for will like what you’ve put together. Love is involved. You cared for the meal. You can see as those around the table chew and swallow, or sometimes even INHALE the food. You performed a primary daily function – feeding others well. Turn on the oven. Get started.

​A couple of weeks back, “Everybody Come Together” by The Youngbloods was playing at the fitness center while I worked out in the morning. I hummed along and watched other people riding the stationary bike, climbing the stair master and stretching out. It was 5:15 a.m. People smiled. Several walked over and chatted with their buddies. You heard laughter.
 
I won’t say all of this was unusual. In general, our workout facility is pretty together with people making friendships, telling stories, helping on the weights. There’s lots of conversation and smiles mixed in with the grunting, sweating, groaning and scowls of intensity.
 
This isn’t to say the song that morning created additional happiness, though I believe it did because I know it affected my mood as I sang along and thought about my day and the best way to approach it in a positive manner – by bringing people together. What it made me consider more is whether we could change our approach to the day by listening to specific mood music.

This is not an un-researched area. Waiting areas at medical centers use this approach by putting on calming music. You’ll find dentists, chiropractors, massage therapists and acupuncturists all use similar approaches – putting on lighter music to relax their patients and get them in a better frame of mind.

And, we all listen to specific music for different reasons. We might want to get away from a bad day and listen to loud bashing acoustics. We might want to get motivated to work harder and put on some hard driving rock and roll. We may find ourselves reminiscing of something sweet and we put on romantic tracks. We reinforce the mood we want, or use music to get away from something we wish to forget.
 
Which circles us back to the issue of bringing people together and creating a more positive atmosphere – something it seems to me almost every individual, company or organization would appreciate. Who can be against better productivity, teammates helping each other, relaxing and listening to others when we have differences? If we played more songs like “Everybody Come Together,” maybe we’ll get a bit closer to that objective.
 
Fitness centers have this figured out. So have many retail stores. Why haven’t more big businesses? Do you ever hear “I Just Want To Celebrate” by Rare Earth when you walk into a corporate environment?  How about “Come Together” by The Beatles? I highly doubt it.

You might get mind-numbing elevator music or some standard tracks that pass the corporate filter, but that’s the best it’s going to get. It must be too risky to rock out. Maybe leadership thinks it will interfere with work rather than enhance it. Or they feel employees will get distracted and start dancing or something weird like that.
 
It seems to me dancing and singing at work would unite and unify your business culture. Think how you feel after you’ve been singing or dancing.  There’s a joyous release. You’re ignited and invigorated. It feels good. Energy surges through your body.
 
Compare those feelings with anger and agitation brought on by watching too much television news. You’re stressed, burned out. You want to argue with other people. Productivity decreases.
 
It seems like a dang simple formula to implement. It won’t guarantee results. But it sure makes sense, and it can’t hurt, can it? Share this column with your boss. Forward this along. Maybe if enough higher-ups read it, they’ll consider a change. We might start coming together. WHOA, can’t have that happen, can we?