This past week, I went up north to watch a high school girls playoff basketball game between two small schools. A friend of mine from many years ago when we refereed basketball together was now the coach of the “P” team as I call it to protect identities.
He has a unique perspective in terms of watching the ebb and flow of the game having been a former referee. Since I have returned to the hardwood the past three years as an official, my insights are garnered from that perspective, plus having cheered for two of our kids as they grew up playing basketball.
I went to the game as a fan and to support my buddy. I hoped they did well, executed, played to the best of their abilities, and if things worked out, they could win.
It didn’t take long after the opening tap for me to hear grumblings. When I referee, I focus on the game. It’s not to say I don’t hear people complaining, but it’s more important for me to work inside the lines and do the best I can, paying attention, hustling and getting the plays right. When a friend or relative attends one of my games and gives me feedback afterwards, they often raise the “grumbling” issue of the fans.
This is not to say the whining and complaining is solely about officiating. The “fans” (though isn’t it hard to call them that when they don’t cheer?) tend to find things and people to pick apart. Rather than supporting their team and cheering with passion (or even to make a lot of noise to rattle the opponent), their eyes and voices target negativity.
This strongly struck me at P’s playoff game. No one was bad. No one screamed like they were popping a blood vessel in their forehead to attack the coach or roast the referee. The voices were subdued and negative.
When plays happened, was their collective applause for a spontaneous good play? No. Instead, there would be collective grousing of voices about a whistle not blown against the opposing team, or directed at one of the head coaches about their choice of plays on an offensive possession.
It seems EVERYONE is a coach and referee these days. I’m not sure if people put that down on their resumes, but a lot of people seem to feel qualified to repeatedly comment on coaches and referees.
I get it. We’re a free speech society. People want to voice their opinions. What I don’t get is why don’t these individuals CHOOSE to be supportive and build their team and players up, rather than jeer and put others down? It seems part of our human condition to push the negative rather than support and cultivate the positive.
This column ain’t gonna change anything other than perhaps touch a few people who want to raise their personal awareness and then choose to reach out and affect others by standing behind their team and coaches rather than against them. I would point out, too, that almost all the whining and complaining came from parents, not from the kids who sat on the other side of the court, who attempted to get some excitement going in support of their teams.
Maybe those teenagers need to talk to their parents to teach them a few things.