Sometimes you think something is going to taste really
good and it doesn’t.  That’s what happened this past
Wednesday.  My wife was out.  I thought I’d make
something for the kids that I’d been contemplating for
many months: Homemade queso with chips.  What could
be easier?

I bought some Velveeta cheese, thinking this would melt
easily.  The version for our two teenagers was going
to have bacon in it, and I was going to make mine 
separately because I like it spicy.  
 
So I fried up the bacon, melted the cheese and mixed it
together.  The problem is, Velveeta doesn’t work.  It
melted.  But then it solidified again and you couldn’t
dip the chips in it very well – too gooey. Plus, it
overwhelmed the bacon taste.  My
kids took a few dips, then ate their salads
and went to their rooms to study. Oh, well.

My version included onion, red pepper and a jalapeno
pepper, all minced up. I thought this would give is spice and bite. 
The same problem occurred with mine.  The Velveeta overwhelmed everything
else, and it was hard to even dig the chips into the mixture without them
breaking apart.

So, I guess you have to melt real cheese or read another
cookbook to figure out the best cheese to use as a base for queso. 
I will try this again.  Next time I’ll check in a cookbook first, then
I’ll throw in all the rest of the stuff.  I’ll let you know when I
give it a shot.

If you’re like a lot of people, when you get Chinese
  takeout, you receive a bunch of sauces to go with your order. 
That typically includes hot mustard, soy sauce, and that sweet stuff
(indescribable) that goes on egg rolls.  You may use one or two, then
put the rest in the frig where they rot for
decades.

Here’s a way to use them (not that you were thinking about this).  The
idea for this concoction was totally random.  It occurred one night as my wife fried
up some eggplant.  I took out all the sauces and squeezed them into a bowl, stirred
them up, tasted it.  Mmmmmm, not bad. 
Really. Kind of sweet, spicy
and tangy.

The mixture is great as a dip.  We use it once or twice a year to clean out
the refrigerator and eat eggplant, because neither of these are typical
occurrences in our household.

Slice the eggplant.  Heat the frying pan to medium high with a thin layer of oil. 
Mix an egg and some milk.  In a paper bag, throw together a coating mixture
(bread crumbs) and for a little more zest, add Old Bay seasoning or some pepper,
or perhaps some Creole powder.  Dip the eggplant slices in
the batter, then shake them in the bread crumb/Old Bay mixture, then place in
the pan to fry.

Turn them as necessary until they are golden on both sides.  You want
it slightly crunchy, but not burnt, obviously.



Bring out the dip. 
Call your guests in.  Start
your party right with these as an appetizer. They’ll be gone in
seconds.