It might be a big vacation you planned. Or, it might be something small, like going swimming in some lake that you’ve driven by for 23 years and it looks so placid and beautiful that you want to stop the car and jump in for a dip. But, because you don’t happen to drive by that lake at exactly the right time, your plans won’t come to fruition. It’s the way life is.
We miss out on some opportunities. Other times, the vagaries of where you are and when, combined with an odd impulse makes you stop and climb a forest trail where a rainbow reveals itself at the summit. You never expected it, you didn’t plan it, but there it was, and your life was enriched.
I keep a host of news clippings regarding places to see, trips to take. This past year, I narrowed down the pile. Sifting through each review or ad, I looked and considered how much I really wanted to visit the location, what the probability honestly was that I would ever go there, and how much I still cared after the information had been sitting in the folder for years.
My wife and I take regular dates to eat at local restaurants. I keep a list for this, too. It’s another reminder to make the effort to go to places that you have an interest in, while also forcing you to make choices on one restaurant or another. If you head to this one tonight, you won’t be going to that one.
You’re not going to make it to certain restaurants. You aren’t going to make it to certain vacation locations.
There’s a sadness – a “letting go” feeling – that occurs as you make considerations about the places you want to visit, but come to understand shouldn’t remain on your bucket list of things to do in the years ahead. Based on your stage of life, letting go could be a decision based on the reality of costs vs. how much money you earn. It could be you let go because you had an interest in some activity that no longer engages you.
Or, as you go through a new stage of life, you realize there’s something different that is more important to you. Years ago, for example, I enjoyed body surfing in the ocean. That urge has not gone away. But, 1) we don’t live near an ocean, and 2) not wanting to sit on a beach for extended periods absorbing solar radiation are both reasons that urge is not as strong as it used to be. The rush of riding a wave to shore is outweighed by logistics.
If the ocean came to me, I’d be there. If, remarkably, we drove near the Atlantic or Pacific during the right of time year, I’d pull the car over and take a dip, swim out, time the wave, paddle forcibly towards the shore to capture a burst of adrenaline. The rush and joy would be there.
It’s good to keep spontaneity open. Don’t throw all those news clips away. Cull the list, add to it, keep it up to date, and leave room for the sudden urge. The impulse joy usually stays in your memory banks.