
After searching every theater within 30 minutes of our house, it became clear that “Colossal” must have been a massive colossal movie failure. It was gone.
That seemed odd to me because scanning the offerings, there was nothing worth seeing as far as I was concerned. I like off-beat movies, something out of the ordinary that makes you think or challenge assumptions. Colossal fit that bill. But, clearly, I am in the significant minority because no one was flocking to watch it.
Instead, as seems to be the case for many years now, what theaters bring in, and retain, are all the tried and true formulas that numb your brain, dumb you down and predictably churn out the bucks. “We know it’s going to turn a $49 million profit, so let’s do it” seems to be the bigwigs’ mantra. Taking a chance on a lesser quantity becomes a more dangerous expedition, so we don’t get many flicks outside the status quo.
As I screened the Internet to find Colossal, I was struck by the sameness and repetitiveness of the other choices. For example, there was, of course, the second installment of a super hero movie that did great the first time in the box office. Man, gotta make a second one of those. And a third! I went to the first and found it entirely predictable (and a bit amusing, with some good songs), but not worthy of investing psychic energy into another round with the characters.
Then, there was 15th remake of the “Fast and the Furious.” Wait, you mean it was only the ninth? Egads, who would have thought? I guess the viewing public just can’t get enough of car crashes, speeding vehicles, attractive actors, guns and bikinis.
There was also the obligatory kids’ animated movie. The name escapes me. You can insert one here, just make it up, it will probably be just as good as what was in the theaters.
Another offering was a classic fantasy model, a love story based centuries ago. Who likes those? I don’t know.
And, there had to be one of those movies about knights with swords, spears and bow and arrow activity, wearing armor plating and talking in English accents from eons ago, like everyone just wants to hear that and ape over how well spoken the Brits were back then. Spare me.
Is it the lowest common denominator that brings these movies to the screen? “They’re safe, let’s do them.”
Are they lower risk? Do they make it because they’re the proven commodity? I don’t get to make those decisions, so I can’t give the answer, but it’s safe to say it’s about the money and squeezing as much cash as you can out of the enterprise.
I wish the executives would take more risks. I wish people in the movie industry with money would mainstream more movies that challenge us, bring idea innovations to the screen, or just something plain DIFFERENT.
It’s hard to count the number of times I’ve wanted to go to the movies and there are 13 showing (all the same movies, BTW, are also at everyone of the surrounding theaters, so there isn’t even the chance to get an extra choice based on trying other locations) and I can’t find one that motivates me. But I’m weird. I’m the frustrated anomaly, and it’s probably going to stay that way.