Sad but true. When we had our kids, we loved it when people came over, held them, made faces, and did the googoo gaga. It was great.
Now I see people who don’t want you to come visit after their baby is born. They make excuses why you can’t step in their house. “Uh, our in-laws will be over Tuesday.” If you suggest Wednesday, the response is, “We’re canning peaches Wednesday.” How about Thursday? “We’re making spaghetti that day, and the house will be a mess.” And so on.
It could certainly be true that they worry about me and see me as a threat to indoctrinate their child with random silliness that they don’t appreciate. But I think it has more to do with germophobia. Who knows where I’ve been? Who knows what disease I might bring in the door and contaminate the baby?
Though I understand and respect that point-of-view, I’m a firm believer that you need to get out there and experience the germs of the world to build up your immunity and grow strong. This doesn’t just apply to babies, but also adults, and picking stuff up off the floor and eating it without dusting it off.
That’s most likely a minority view in the U.S., where germophobia is the highest in first world nations as assessed by the Simon Polling Index, a random gathering of information gleaned from lengthy and lively interpersonal discussions with friends. The poll is also based on observations of human activities.
Take washing your hands for example. A high percentage of people were raised to wash their hands before eating food and after going to the bathroom. The goal was and is to kill germs.
This makes sense for the most part. But if you start to wash your hands 9-11 times a day, which could easily be the case if you ate a lot of snacks or had a small bladder, at some point you’re washing every little piece of bacteria off your palms. That includes the good bacteria needed fight the bad bacteria.
Part of the soap conspiracy is pushed by the manufacturers of liquid hand cleansers, and the plastic dispensers that hold them. They want to sell product. So remember all those germs every time you touch a door, pull out your keys, pay for a movie with cash, shake someone’s hand or turn a door knob. They are loaded with microscopic organisms waiting to infect your bloodstream, brain and nervous system, turning you into a sniffling, coughing, diarrhea-making and vomiting machine.
The hand lotion companies are part of this conspiracy too, as once you’ve washed your hands too often (Is twice a day too much? Three times? Six?), they become chapped. The only way to get rid of the cracks and crevices is to lather them up with some lotion. The lotion companies LOVE germophobia.
The media though are the prime dispensers of germophobia so that you keep tuning in. As long as they can continue to scare you (or at least get you thinking that there might be validity to the idea that washing your hands 12 times a day is a “good” thing), you’ll keep watching their newscasts. “OMG, I might die if I don’t scrub my hands raw after picking up that peanut from the counter.”
No, you really won’t. I’m living proof. But I’m part of the anti-germophobia movement, and irrelevant. So keep on scrubbing those hands with liquid soap and buy stock in hand lotion companies. They love you.