There’s a longstanding myth that you can be anything you want in life. The reality is: You can’t. We need to quit lying to ourselves.
This myth has been perpetuated year after year. It’s so insinuated into U.S. culture that it’s hard to separate the concept out and look at it logically and realistically for what it really is.
We grow up being told if we work hard enough, study, play by the rules, then certain rewards will accrue. I’m a strong believer in putting the time and effort into learning and becoming a better employee as we move into the workforce, whether it’s straight from high school, after a stint in the military or college. The more we contribute, the more we should earn, and we should receive more flexibility and authority within our jobs.
At the same time, you can’t just be anything. No matter how much I would work at it, I’m not going to be a good auto mechanic, software engineer or physicist. My mind doesn’t work that way.
Pick any person or look inside yourself, and you can say something similar. Some things we are good at, and we can develop those talents over the years. We are weak in other areas, and if we are honest with ourselves, we know we shouldn’t pursue certain professions -- that would be a disaster.
Given the divide between gurus who say “you can be anything” and reality of life, is it any wonder our society seems so schizophrenic? When you have a lot of people thinking they can be something they can’t, there are many unrealized expectations, and dangerous personalities lurking about.
One of my pet peeves is people who write books, lecture, tweet, blog or train others to believe anything is within their potential. We need to disabuse ourselves of that notion.
I’m an okay golfer, for example. In my book, “Bad Golf” (www.justwrite15.com/bad-golf), I lay out the premise that most people fall into the bad golf category, defined as shooting 18 over par (or more) for a round. Statistically, 90% of golfers fall into that category.
The irony is that most people would not call themselves bad golfers. Instead, they retain hope they will become a decent golfer or a good golfer, just like I deceive myself that “Bad Golf” deserves to be an international best seller despite its sales of 700 copies over four years.
It is BS we are fed by leadership speakers and authors who repeat their mantra that if you set your mind to it and keep a positive attitude, you’ll get the job of your dreams and wake up every day singing your favorite song. But many gobble it up, just as the bad golfer does – presuming he will magically be able to change one little thing to improve his game.
It takes dramatic effort, dedication and talent to get to an elite level of anything. And that’s the stuff the leadership drones preach to the masses. It’s a tonic most of us should not guzzle.
Instead, find your niche. When you seek your ideal job and have looked for it repeatedly over a three-year period, it may not be out there. Find something that works for you, pays the bills and allows you to live within your means (IF you can even find that job in today’s economy).
Pursuing what you are good at and enjoy (something I’ve done my entire career) doesn’t guarantee you arrive at Nirvana Land. It doesn’t mean you’ll ever land your ideal job.
At the same time, if you push down that path, it does place you in an area where you should be. Are you reasonably happy? Have you had a decent career?
If you can answer “yes” to those questions, that’s probably enough for most of us. If it’s “no,” then get outside your comfort zone.
This myth has been perpetuated year after year. It’s so insinuated into U.S. culture that it’s hard to separate the concept out and look at it logically and realistically for what it really is.
We grow up being told if we work hard enough, study, play by the rules, then certain rewards will accrue. I’m a strong believer in putting the time and effort into learning and becoming a better employee as we move into the workforce, whether it’s straight from high school, after a stint in the military or college. The more we contribute, the more we should earn, and we should receive more flexibility and authority within our jobs.
At the same time, you can’t just be anything. No matter how much I would work at it, I’m not going to be a good auto mechanic, software engineer or physicist. My mind doesn’t work that way.
Pick any person or look inside yourself, and you can say something similar. Some things we are good at, and we can develop those talents over the years. We are weak in other areas, and if we are honest with ourselves, we know we shouldn’t pursue certain professions -- that would be a disaster.
Given the divide between gurus who say “you can be anything” and reality of life, is it any wonder our society seems so schizophrenic? When you have a lot of people thinking they can be something they can’t, there are many unrealized expectations, and dangerous personalities lurking about.
One of my pet peeves is people who write books, lecture, tweet, blog or train others to believe anything is within their potential. We need to disabuse ourselves of that notion.
I’m an okay golfer, for example. In my book, “Bad Golf” (www.justwrite15.com/bad-golf), I lay out the premise that most people fall into the bad golf category, defined as shooting 18 over par (or more) for a round. Statistically, 90% of golfers fall into that category.
The irony is that most people would not call themselves bad golfers. Instead, they retain hope they will become a decent golfer or a good golfer, just like I deceive myself that “Bad Golf” deserves to be an international best seller despite its sales of 700 copies over four years.
It is BS we are fed by leadership speakers and authors who repeat their mantra that if you set your mind to it and keep a positive attitude, you’ll get the job of your dreams and wake up every day singing your favorite song. But many gobble it up, just as the bad golfer does – presuming he will magically be able to change one little thing to improve his game.
It takes dramatic effort, dedication and talent to get to an elite level of anything. And that’s the stuff the leadership drones preach to the masses. It’s a tonic most of us should not guzzle.
Instead, find your niche. When you seek your ideal job and have looked for it repeatedly over a three-year period, it may not be out there. Find something that works for you, pays the bills and allows you to live within your means (IF you can even find that job in today’s economy).
Pursuing what you are good at and enjoy (something I’ve done my entire career) doesn’t guarantee you arrive at Nirvana Land. It doesn’t mean you’ll ever land your ideal job.
At the same time, if you push down that path, it does place you in an area where you should be. Are you reasonably happy? Have you had a decent career?
If you can answer “yes” to those questions, that’s probably enough for most of us. If it’s “no,” then get outside your comfort zone.