There’s a syndrome that I call “Tailing Off” that has become amazingly prevalent in electronically-connected societies these days. It’s fairly easy to describe because you have either experienced it when someone does it to you, or you have done it to someone yourself.
It can happen through any information transmission, but is primarily noticeable through email or texting. It goes along the lines of the following:
A communication begins between you and another individual. It starts with one of you inquiring about an issue, stating a fact, trying to set up a meeting or date. The other person replies. This leads to some short bursts of badly typed words, incomplete sentences and bizarre abbreviations that either get autocorrected to make the transmission incomprehensible or totally intelligent.
These messages go back and forth in a burst of minutes, typically ending in less than half an hour. When done, you sigh in relief.
You may have chuckled a few times or smiled to yourself at what your friend wrote or related to you. You may be proud of how fully you laid out a plan to bring a new customer on board.
What didn’t occur though was “completion.” As you were both tapping back forth, there was a date you were trying to set or a decision you wanted to make. Looking back on the transmissions, this didn’t happen.
Instead, you got some happy talk. Yes, you “planned” to get together or “talked about” making a decision, but someone left the ball hanging in the air.
This has happened to me more times than I can count, hence the “Tailing Off” syndrome mentioned earlier has been coined. “Hey, Linda, you trailed off on me. Set a date.”
Most recently, I had a text dialogue with a former coworker. I passed on some information about how things were going in the office, she inquired about some other stuff.
The whole thing tailed off and I was left waiting for us to get together for a lunch meeting. She asked for open dates; I gave them to her. Then zero.
Probably I am a loser, because this happens to me a lot. There is this delirious frenzy of tapping and sending, catching up with someone, giving little snippets of data, but then when it comes to step up to the plate, there is no follow-through.
I’m not sure why this happens. Typically, I think the person who is leaving the ball hanging actually thinks that the issue at hand has been resolved and there is no more communication to go out. The second explanation is that the next texting or emailing situation has taken over the current one, so your dialogue goes into the recesses of the brain of the other person, never to surface again unless you jog him or her with a note the following week.
“Yo, Brendan, been waiting 4 u at Wing Stop for 22 minutes. R u showing?”
You don’t even need to be at the Wing Stop. Just pretend like you are, and see if that draws a response regarding the fact that Brendan was supposed to set up the lunch. Sometimes you can get away with this and your communication partner fumbles for an excuse, saying he’ll be right over.
“Tailing Off” is a growing phenomenon the past 3-4 years as the wireless handheld device has grown ubiquitous. Our previous state of being tethered to a computer screen or laptop tended to keep us thinking slightly more linearly. Now it’s no holds barred.
Stuff comes at you from every direction and because you keep your device ready most of the day, you feel lured in. You forget to finish conversations. You don’t follow through. You tail off.
If you resurrect the electronic conversation, send a “whoops” note to your friend or coworker. Start a new thread, so this time they can tail off on you. Tag, you’re it.
It can happen through any information transmission, but is primarily noticeable through email or texting. It goes along the lines of the following:
A communication begins between you and another individual. It starts with one of you inquiring about an issue, stating a fact, trying to set up a meeting or date. The other person replies. This leads to some short bursts of badly typed words, incomplete sentences and bizarre abbreviations that either get autocorrected to make the transmission incomprehensible or totally intelligent.
These messages go back and forth in a burst of minutes, typically ending in less than half an hour. When done, you sigh in relief.
You may have chuckled a few times or smiled to yourself at what your friend wrote or related to you. You may be proud of how fully you laid out a plan to bring a new customer on board.
What didn’t occur though was “completion.” As you were both tapping back forth, there was a date you were trying to set or a decision you wanted to make. Looking back on the transmissions, this didn’t happen.
Instead, you got some happy talk. Yes, you “planned” to get together or “talked about” making a decision, but someone left the ball hanging in the air.
This has happened to me more times than I can count, hence the “Tailing Off” syndrome mentioned earlier has been coined. “Hey, Linda, you trailed off on me. Set a date.”
Most recently, I had a text dialogue with a former coworker. I passed on some information about how things were going in the office, she inquired about some other stuff.
The whole thing tailed off and I was left waiting for us to get together for a lunch meeting. She asked for open dates; I gave them to her. Then zero.
Probably I am a loser, because this happens to me a lot. There is this delirious frenzy of tapping and sending, catching up with someone, giving little snippets of data, but then when it comes to step up to the plate, there is no follow-through.
I’m not sure why this happens. Typically, I think the person who is leaving the ball hanging actually thinks that the issue at hand has been resolved and there is no more communication to go out. The second explanation is that the next texting or emailing situation has taken over the current one, so your dialogue goes into the recesses of the brain of the other person, never to surface again unless you jog him or her with a note the following week.
“Yo, Brendan, been waiting 4 u at Wing Stop for 22 minutes. R u showing?”
You don’t even need to be at the Wing Stop. Just pretend like you are, and see if that draws a response regarding the fact that Brendan was supposed to set up the lunch. Sometimes you can get away with this and your communication partner fumbles for an excuse, saying he’ll be right over.
“Tailing Off” is a growing phenomenon the past 3-4 years as the wireless handheld device has grown ubiquitous. Our previous state of being tethered to a computer screen or laptop tended to keep us thinking slightly more linearly. Now it’s no holds barred.
Stuff comes at you from every direction and because you keep your device ready most of the day, you feel lured in. You forget to finish conversations. You don’t follow through. You tail off.
If you resurrect the electronic conversation, send a “whoops” note to your friend or coworker. Start a new thread, so this time they can tail off on you. Tag, you’re it.